I do murals, straight up painting, repair work and other creative type things to keep a money flow coming in but my goal is to one day simply do my art. I want to paint the stories that I feel passionate about. I want to be able to make a difference in this world through the art that I create.
My Goddess project that I have been working on is one of those passions. I don’t paint them because I expect to get rich, I paint them because I have to. There are times when I don’t get to work on them because I am busy with the survival things. It is easy for me to put myself, and my dreams, behind other things, the “practical” things. Then someone buys me some paint that I need, another sends me a check for new brushes and most recently, someone buys me some more boards so that I can start a new Goddess. (Not only does she buy me a board, she enlists the help of a friend who doesn’t even know me to deliver them to my home!)
I cannot even explain how this feels to me. To know that what I am doing is maybe something more than just MY dream. To know that perhaps it matters to others as well. It’s a validation that is huge for an artist like me. It keeps me motivated, it keeps me going. (It makes me feel less guilty for spending money on paint when I have a hundred other things I probably “should” be spending it on!)
To all my friends and to those I’ve never even met who have supported me in every way, I thank you. It’s huge.
I’m thinking about all those who have supported me and my art. I am amazed sometimes.
I have new boards because a friend of mine wanted to see more goddesses. She sees their value and importance. It’s a wonderful feeling to know that it’s not just me!
When Erzulie was on display there were people who literally fell down in front of her and cried. She was real for them. Like She’s real for me. And that keeps me going.
I recently had a family member ask if I was ever going to “get a job”. I didn’t understand, because I have a job. More than that, I have a purpose.
I’m an artist. I don’t do this as a hobby. I do this because I have to. As any artist will tell you, if we don’t create, we die.
It isn’t about recognition. Lord knows it isn’t about the money! It’s about creation. And the ability to perceive things others cannot. This ability has helped me to survive.
My next Goddess will be Sedna. She is an Inuit Goddess who created the seals, the whales…She did not do this willingly. She was pushed into her fate. Literally, pushed off the boat!
What she chose in that moment was not to be a victim but rather to make life from what was certain death.
Sometimes we have to be pushed to our absolute limit before we find the strength to act. But when we do act, it becomes about choices..even when we think there are none.
It will be interesting to see what happens when the color hits the brush. Then her story starts, all over again, for me.